Drunks are bad. So are talking parents. And teenagers taking group pictures during your Fraidy Cat Rabbit routine.
Contrary to rumors, I am a human being.
I have emotions to handle. The tear ducts in my eyes shed tears.
I have had bookers asked me to do shows for cancer-stricken children. Performing for sick kids has opened my eyes to an awful truth: I suck at emotion management.
Those daring to present a talking performance usually opt for the easy way. They use a generous amount of clichés in their scripts.
Clichés are expressions that have lost the power to touch the emotion due to years of overuse.
I’ve listed a few below. I hate them because I once made them parts of my show. But one day I had an epiphany. I realized I’ve grown tired of them.
I once went to a party of a rich kid and wanted to be friendly. “Hello, what’s your name?” I greeted the birthday kid. He said, “I’m Harvey and you are STUPID.”
Yesterday I performed magic at a boy’s seventh birthday party. I kept forgetting my script and the flow of my tricks, because the kids were super noisy. They were chattering non-stop. They kept claiming they had seen my tricks before. They shouted the methods of the tricks.
Help me please. Is there a kid-friendly way to say “shut up” while I’m performing?
For example, when someone asks me for my birthday, I answer, “March 9.”
If the one questioning is a pain-in-the-ass type and pursues the topic with a follow-up question, “What year?”, he gets a smart aleck answer, “Every year.”
Mr. Humble wrote a letter yesterday asking why some magicians appear boastful.
To Mr. Humble, here are three reasons that drive magicians into bragging and displays of boastfulness:
1) They assume a cocky attitude to compensate for their lack of confidence. Yes, most beginning magicians, being as green as green mangoes, lack confidence. They need weeks, maybe months or years in the trenches before they become self-assured.
They are like airline pilots. They need to rack up flight-time to hone their skills. In the meantime, they fake their confidence. They wrap themselves up in bluster when performing magic.
I’m referring to the magicians, not the pilots.
Hi Mr. Humble,
I’ve read your question and I’ve kept my cool.
Isn’t that cool? Me keeping my cool after reading your un-cool question?
I stumbled upon it when my audiences claimed that, because I can make them laugh, I’m a comedian.
I’m not. Honest.
In real life, I’m as contemplative as a Tibetian monk.
My wife and children think listening to my jokes is torture. Every time I attempt to tell them a joke, they pray the rosary.
And they don’t even know how to pray it.
Stunning pictures and videos aside, I judge a photographer’s professionalism neither by his skills. Nor by his equipment. Nor by his looks.
I judge him by his inconspicuous presence.
When a skilful photographer covers an event, he is discreet. Low key. And unobtrusive.
He does not hinder the proceedings. He does not obstruct views.
People hardly notice he is there. He works quietly. Without fanfare.
He is invisible.