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childrentalking2I’ve heard magicians complain that children talk among themselves during a magic show.

What does this mean? my magician friends ask.

I don’t know what that means. I was not there, so I didn’t hear the words the children used.

If the children talked in French, I wouldn’t know either. Even though I speak 10 foreign languages perfectly, seven of those languages I don’t understand.

French is one of the seven I don’t understand.

For me, there are two types of child talk. Type One— the child talks directly to the magician, as in, “I saw the rabbit run that way.” Or “Turn the card around!” Or “Do it again.” Or “The ball is on a string!”.

Type Two—the children talk among themselves. They nudge each other and whisper to one another, “Did you see that?” “What did I tell ya. The rabbit would appear in that red box!”

yousuckType Three—the children talk at length among themselves. They are not listening to the magician. They are exchanging blows. They are making faces and saying, “This magician sucks. Let’s go play video games.”

The first two types should fill your soul with joy.

The third suggests that you practice your tricks more or consider committing suicide.

Stay magical,